Labyrinth
I honestly think I’ve seen Jim Henson’s Labyrinth fifty times (a lucky benefit of a previous Day Job). I’ve mentioned in earlier posts that I’m a huge sucker for 1980’s fantasy, and while this is not my FAVORITE of the genre, it’s definitely up there. I can also testify with first person, real world examples that I’m not the only fan of Labyrinth– just google “Labyrinth Ball” and you’ll see what I mean.
If you are not at all familiar with Labyrinth, you are in for a fantastical, trippy, hilarious, disturbing, musically rich, puppet filled ride. Passionately imaginative young Sarah (played by a very sophisticated 14 yr old Jennifer Connelly) is pissed that her infant brother Toby exists and acts like a baby. Left to take care of him while her father and stepmother spend their evening out (pretty clear daddy issues early on), Sarah wishes, after a couple of flubs, for baby Toby to be stolen away by the Goblin King. Little does she know that the Goblin King Jareth (drumroll for David Bowie) is listening. Sarah spends the remainder of the film navigating through a glittery labyrinth filled with puppet friends and foes in order to reach Jareth’s castle and rescue her aerodynamic (you’ll see what I mean) little brother.
Fair warning, Henson and his creative cohorts (notably Monty Python’s Terry Jones) do not patronize their viewers– characters, creatures, sets and dialogue are mature and even dark at times. Who knew fairies bite? But this is what makes Labyrinth so wonderful. Henson acknowledges that growing up can be deceptive and terrifying, and does so while maintaining the same wit and innovation that fueled The Muppet Show and The Dark Crystal. Because of this, you’ll find that general audiences enjoy Labyrinth just as much as kids and (we’re a group unto ourselves) millennial fantasy nerds.
But let’s face it, older audiences also love David Bowie. Because who doesn’t. The hair, the feathers, the tights, the … glass balls, the songs– many consider Bowie’s contributions to the Labyrinth soundtrack to be a significant part of his legacy. One need only listen to the lyric “It’s only forever, not long at all,” to hear that Bowie, like Henson, perfectly understood the telescoping contradictions of childhood. Very few other talents could have walked the line between mysterious and disturbing so successfully, and on what would have been his 75th birthday today (January 8, 2022), I hope David Bowie is Magic Dancing his way up/down/sideways through a goblin castle. In space.
There are about a million other pieces of trivia I could include here, but you can find most if not all of it in The Jim Henson Company’s Red Book (compiled by the amazing archival team at that company). In the meantime, let’s get to the below– a meal inspired by the adventures of Sarah, Jareth, Hoggle, Didymus, Ambrrrrocious, and Ludo that I hope you find delicious, whimsical, and amusing. C’mon feet.
PS, look closely at this post’s header photo. There might be a hidden Bowie face in there…
The Movie
The Menu
A spiced tea drink that pays homage to my favorite Labyrinth creatures-- the 'Allo Worm and the (super creepy) Fireys! It's both comforting enough for an indoor drink with the missus and strong enough to make you lose your head. When your thing gets wild, chilly down, chilly down! Start with the spiced orange syrup-- in a small saucepan, combine all the ingredients designated and bring to a boil. Reduce heat and simmer until all of the sugar has dissolved and the syrup slightly thickened. Allow to come to room temperature, and strain out the solids. Chill until ready to use. For the cocktail, combine the syrup with bourbon, tea and bitters. Add ice balls and garnish with a slice of orange. A delightfully odorific soup for brave souls in need of a Labyrinth starter. Feel free to suspend yourself, head first, over the bowl-- the lovely scents of truffle and gruyere will never wash off mmmmmm. Hey look it's a bunch of kinda smelly ingredients! Start off by turning your onions into a nummy gooey fragrant mess. Melt your butter in a medium pot over medium heat. Add the onions, salt and pepper and cook until the onions are very soft and caramelized, about 25 minutes. Add the mushrooms and garlic, and sautee until mushrooms are softened. Toss with flour and allow to coat the vegetables until the flour smell disappates, about a minute. Next, add the brandy and simmer for another 30 seconds. Add bay leaf, thyme, the beef broth, and fish sauce and bring your soup back to a simmer. Cook for about 45 minutes until about 1/4 is reduced. Season, to taste, with salt and pepper. When you're ready to eat, preheat the broiler. Arrange your croutons on a baking sheet in a single layer. Sprinkle the slices with the Gruyere and broil until bubbly and golden brown, about 2 minutes. Ladle the soup in bowls and float several of the Gruyere croutons on top-- rocks, frieeeends. Add shaved truffle, to garnish. Ok Ok so Chicken a la Goblin King is a little punny-- but there are a LOT of chickens in Labyrinth! No joke, it's a thing, there is even a facebook group. I added a few flourishes for Jareth (forbidden rice and ahem chicken THIGHS, ahem) and brother Toby (baby veggies) and you've got a main course fit for a Goblin City banquet. Now sing it with me-- you remind me of the babe (what babe?) the babe with the power (what power?) the power of voodoo (who do?) you do (do what?) remind me of the babe! Preheat your oven to 425. Pat your chicken thighs dry with paper towels, rub about a tbsp of olive oil into the skin, and season with salt and pepper. Heat another tbsp of olive in a cast iron skillet and set over medium high/high heat. Once the oil is hot, add the chicken thighs, skin down, to the pan and sear for about three minutes until the skin browns. Flip the thighs and cook for two more minutes. In the meantime, toss your carrots and onions with remaining olive oil, thyme, and some salt and pepper. Add to the heated cast iron skillet with the chicken and move the pan to the oven. Roast for about 30 minutes (chicken thighs are done at about 165 degrees, if you have a meat thermometer handy). Remove your cast iron from the oven and shift the poultry to another plate. Place pan back over high heat and brown your mostly cooked veggies, throwing your peas as well-- remove to the same plate as the chicken. You should still have a fair amount of rendered fat in the pan-- Pour all but about 2 tbsps away, and add butter to the pan and place on medium heat. When the butter is melted, add the flour to make a roux-- stir until you get a wet sand consistency. You'll know it's finished cooking when the flour smell disappates and you are left with a buttery popcorn aroma. Add the half and half, onion powder, mustard and pimentos, whisking until fully incorporated. To serve, add black rice to a plate or shallow bowl, and top with browned veggies and chicken. Top with A la Goblin King sauce and some freshly chopped parsley. Consume until there's nothing left-- nothing? Nothing? NOTHING? Nothing, tra la la? I rarely put instructions for cooking rice in recipes since different brands might have different ways of preparing it. Just follow the instructions on the package, with one consistent variation-- instead of water, I always use chicken or vegetable broth and a pinch of salt. Adds more flavor. So, the Labyrinth is a piece of cake, is it? Well, let's see how you deal with this little slice... These Escher-esque confections are seriously, seriously good. BEWARE BEWARE, however-- one bite may cause Ba-baba-BOOM! Certain DEATH! Just kidding, but there might be hallucinations in which you are courted by a very age-inappropriate rock star who spins you around in a ball gown whilst surrounded by creepy people in Eyes Wide Shut masks. It's worth it tho. First, preheat your oven to 350 degrees and grease the inner walls of six cupcake tins. Slice peaches about 1/4 inch thick-- a little thicker is ok, and if you're using frozen peaches, cut while still a LITTLE frozen. Sift dry ingredients (1-5 in the above list) together in a medium bowl. Add shortening, peach nectar, milk, vanilla, and zest and beat with a hand mixer for about 2 minutes. Add the egg last, and beat for 2 minutes longer. Set batter aside briefly while you prep your cake "topping". Melt your butter and pour, still hot and 1/2 tbsp at a time, into the bottom of your six cupcake tins. Sprinkle the brown sugar evenly over your melted butter, also 1/2 tbsp per tin, stirring and shifting gently to ensure even coverage. Next, arrange your peach slices 3 to a tin in a slight spiral pattern. Any gaps should be small. Pour batter over fruit carefully, so that you do not displace any of the peach slices-- spread gently smooth. Bake for 30 minutes. Remove from the oven and allow to cool in the pan for 15 mins. Carefully invert over a cutting board or cake tray/plate, and lift the pan away from the cakes. You should be left with a beautiful caramelized fruit topping! Feel free to sprinkle with a bit of cinnamon, if you like a bit more spice. I think Jareth would approve. You can of course use regular vanilla. I just happen to have a fancy mother who makes her own infused vanillas, and I reap the benefits.
Chilly Down and have a Cuppa
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Bog of Stench Soup
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Chicken A La Goblin King with Baby Vegetables
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Upside Down Peach Cakes
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Epilogue
Labyrinth is evergreen and hilarious and so is Flight of the Conchords. This episode never. gets. old. Skip to 3:03 for the real good Goblin King stuff.
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